Euphemism

For you people who don't know what a euphemism is, it's making a rude or bad word mild. I find some of them a bit funny. So for absolutly no reason, I'm going to make a list of them

Poop, Shit - Excremante (I think thats the right spelling)

Fat - Over-weighted, fluffy (?), curvy, spilling over the edges.

Old used rubbish cars - Pre-owned vehicles

Toilet Paper - Bathroom Tissue (Used by 'Bathroom Tissue' brands)

War - Police action ( :P )

Torture - Persuasion

Gambling - Good Gaming

One thing to. I have made up my own word. It's "Fartso" (a cross between "Fart" and "Fatso")

Sleep Farting and Funny Songs

My bro who shares a room with me, claims that I fart in my sleep. He was really annoyed and disgusted but I was amazed. I couldn't stop talking about it. I'll write a song (Parody of "Talking in your sleep")

" I hear the methane that you keep.
When you're farting in your sleep
I hear the methane that you keep.
When you're farting in your sleep"

While we're on the topic of funny songs, I love The Beatle's, "I am The Walrus"

"Sitting on a cornflake, waiting for the van to come.
Corporation t-shirts, stupid bloody Tuesday.
Man, you've been a naughty boy, you let your face grow long.

I am the eggman (woo),
they are the eggmen (woo),
I am the walrus, Koo koo kachoo."

HOLIDAYS!

The last day of school is tommorrow (YAY!) so I'm goin to write a poem about the upcoming holidays. Tommorrow I have French so I'm goin to dedicate this post in French.

Je ne suis pas de ce que je vais faire pendant les vacances. Je suis juste heureux im faire avec l'école. Mes frères et moi d'aller au cyber café de cette semaine. J'ai été en attente pour jouer à Counter Strike âges. Je tiens aussi à ma bro ordures dans Need For Speed Most Wanted sur le LAN.

(This probably has thousands of mistakes 'cus I used a phrase translator.)

WHAT! WHERE?

So I'm 11 and I never want to be a teenager. It's scientifically proven that this is the time your brain gets messed up. Yet, I have one of the grossest things a teenager could have-

ZITS

But, fortunately, I don't have them on my face. Guess where -

MY LEGS

Now this is probably when you go "EEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!" (Or if you're anything like me, "SWEEEEEEEEEET!!!"). They occasionally pop up. I think the most of had at once was about 2 or 3. I have a rather large one on my left leg. I think i'll call him Jeremy.

EXAMS!

My exams are starting tommorow so i'm trying to cram everything into my brain. I will recite a poem (of my own style) to express my feelings and stuff.

Oh exams, they make me so blue,

What are the answers - I haven't a clue.

All my teeth are now clenched,

For I did not study at all for French.

I absolutely forgot all that was taught,

I was distracted by my teacher's dripping snot.

Instead of paying the price,

A cunning plan, I will devise.

A straight line is all it takes,

To turn all my F's into A's.

After that, everything will be okay!